numb

trapped within the void in me!! i can't recollect the pain,all the hurt that you caused!!


walking this life, i can't see,all alone but not the lonliness!!
you've taken away the feel!!

left me here with all these cold!!just the numb and dark inside!!
the pain's long dawn,the hurt long gone!!


i can't feel the grown no more!nor the sky, can i touch!!
everythings hazy and gray, black and white no more!


at least make me feel the pain, the sorrow as they say!!

for with this death numb blankness that i see, i can feel no more...

How to save the world - Experiment 2

The other day I was trying to write a truly touching love story. But then it got me thinking; why are all the great love stories so sad. Well I guess deep down everyone's just sadistic or rather we are just disgustingly selfish and can't bear the thought of others being happy.
Then again this makes me sort of sick and I go back to my original view that everyone is inherently good , its generally just the situation or the circumstances. This thought usually keeps me sane or at least makes this world slightly more tolerable.

Now digging deeper, what exactly are these circumstances that drive us to do things which we normally wouldn't have done? Or rather what exactly forces us to step onto each others toes all the time?

Well it sounds quite simple actually; like god created only a single Scarlet Johanson. This has resulted many a toes being crushed and many a wars being raged. So if I were God I probably would've created at least a billion Scarlet Johansons.

Then again, this wouldn't have resolved the problems of the world. Because Charlize Theron would have felt left out and justifiably so. So I would've been forced to make half a billion Charlize Therons and half a billion Scarlet Johansons.

Well if you do the differential right this in the end would have brought me back to making the only single Charlize or Scarlet or Jolie onto this world. So this wasn't a very good exercise.

So I'll let the world be as it is for a while.

A simple plan to safe the world

If you think hard enough, you’d realize that most or all of world's problems are caused by people wanting to be different from the rest; a country trying to be better then the other, a dude trying to proof he's smarter etc. We just have to look into page #934 of our middle school history book for confirmation.

Now all these problems can be solved if we take away any form of hope from every living being on this world that they can be different. Make them realize deep down they are all the same disgusting creature.

One way of doing this is to serialize names; make sure everyone has similar but uniquely identifiable names. Like say 34567892, I think you got the idea here. Such serialized production of the human species will make sure the growth is more properly planned and people wouldn't have to fight 'cos one's called Aslam and the other Jeffrey.
This also in a way gives each of us a uniquely identifiable identity. Now you will know exactly what happened to 453456790 in school the other day. See 453456790 will never have to fight too hard to proof that he's different, nor will he have to fight to get a page in that middle school history book. A page per person based on the name. How cool is that.
The world would be a nice place to live again.

confession of stupid

I tend to get frustrated with a lot of things; more often then not its with myself and my inability to do what's right. well I've this sneaking feeling that this is the case with most of the people, or at least the one's I am close to... maybe I am trying to comfort myself with this thought! or maybe I've just given up on myself...

well this is kind of hard to swallow, no one really likes admitting that they are losers... well after all I'll still have to keep up the fight... at least keep a little space within me for it!!!

I still like to bilief I am a good person and I can do some good in this world!!!

life's lesson lost

every mistake you make, it invariably finds a way to come back and bite you in the ass!!!there's never a thing like a close or lucky escape!!
but still somehow i refuse to learn. i am still lazier then ever...
-- amen

Overrated

I don't have the usual softwares, so called word-processors that helps us retards stay the way we are!
then no matter how modest, still some part of me still sort of refuses to accept that knowing where exactly to put my E's and I's doesn't nessarily mean I am einstein! spelling is overrated... grammer is shitty and boring!after all language is nothing but a means of communication, a way to get yourself heard. So if you put your I's in the wrong place once in a while it's alrite!

it feels good to be noticed...

i am not totally vain... at least i would like to believe I am not!
but it certainly feels great to be know someone noticed!!!

i've corrected my error... do check up :):):)

it can be a pretty long trip!!!

it really can be a pretty long and rough road; this life!!!
we really need all the little pushes and nudges we get along the way!!!

if only we could get rid of THESE walls we build around us... our egos and false pride!
if only things were simpler?

steal my pain!!!

oh boy... wat nonsense!!!
i love my miseries... let me be

ohhh!!!how i hate u GOD

it can't get worst then this, can it?
Chris f#(#ing cornell performing at the gardens on july 31st and i am out of town!!
why do you've to do this to me? always!!!!

drop the boundaries!!!

Humans have this inexplicable tendency of demarcation!
They create all these boundaries, which probably helps them, form this false sense of Identity; a thing they so much seem to crave for. Humans tend to get so wrapped up around these little boundaries, walls which they tend to build around them that they tend to forget that we all somehow are sharing one single home and the stink of the mess on the other side of the wall will always get carried over to your side.

We all need to break down these walls and start looking at our home; try to improve it as a whole. Their’s nothing like an identity. Every person on this earth has different identities at different point of time. You can be a father, a rockstar, a poet, a hippie all at some point of time or at the same time. It’s not at all fair neither is it correct to identify a person just based on one single trait.

This brings me down to the worst kind of boundaries of them all that’s causing so much pain around; religion, nationality.

These two walls that humans have built around themselves has been the bane of so many evils which is degrading our home the earth.

what am I talking?

Why do humans lie?

It's a sort of defense mechanism humans have developed over the ages. Now the level of precision that has been achieved so far varies from individual to individual. Like for example, I rarely ever lie. You may take it with a pinch of salt but that is a fact. Now you may mostly ask me how I am still surviving without such an important defense mechanism, didn't you read about Darwin's survival of the fittest in middle school?well I was always too good for any school lessons so I pretty much ignored most of the stuff that were scribbled down on that big black board at that time. I just guess I was way ahead of my time. As I always say, I never lie.Now the question is, my great great great grand parents and their great grand parents fought tooth and nail to get me up so high in the food chain, don't I feel even a little bit indebted towards keeping that tradition alive?Well truth is, I take that responsibility very seriously.And how do I go about doing what it takes? Well to bigin with, I make sure I vehemently denounce all the plant eaters of the universe and try my best to persuade each and every one of them to have a bite at that tasty, succulent piece of masterpiece GOD created for us, "THE CHICKEN STEAK"...Everyone, I mean everyone comes up with a stroke of total genius at some point in thier life, GOD is no exception. He achieved this place of total NIRVANA, "THE THING", when he came up with chicken, rather THE CHICKEN.shoot... all these talk is making me hungry... now let me go and pay homage to the greatest invention ever.

the perfect recipe...

Pointers to good restaurant (not the obvious - food):
Roof: Depending on how upscale you really want, you need to adjust your roof heights accordingly.
Lightings: It needs to be warm, preferably on the brighter side. Everything looks better with good lighting.
Decibel level: Make sure it’s not as noisy as a fish market. However a few customers get turned off if they feel they are restricted from talking a little freely, so you got to try and set the environment accordingly.
Space: Give ample space between tables. I know I am curious, but I don’t like sharing my fried dumpling with my neighbor.
An attentive host: Make sure there’s always and eye watching on every table. Keep asking on every table every few intervals. Any customer who you feel is looking for some assistant shouldn’t wait on you to complete your heroes’ season finale.
Now you guys add on...

why am I so cynical!!!

You need to give people more responsibilities!keep them busy doing stuff that'll hardly matter.I've grown more cynical and totally uninterested with things happening around me everyday. Maybe this is a sign God is giving me to move on to newer things in life... well this realization came down on me quite a long time back! now the question is what new and exciting things are in store for me ahead!!!that's another issue, you really don't know what's important and what makes you happy in life. you basically don't know why you landed on this earth in the first place.
I refuse to believe in myself, or for that matter I don't believe in heroes; a few good man making a difference. You try and fight for people who deserve no better. Everyone has to fight there own battles, then only can you think of the wars. You don't get any free brownies in life. All these farcical talks about changes, about revolutions; where does it take us? To some false sense of utopia which will never be?
Well the whole concept of Utopia is skewed, basically its all about self-fulfillment more then anything else. We all have part of that little kid left in some small part of our conciousness; and this small kid would have us believe that someone, somewhere's gonna come in and clean up all these mess; everything's gonna be alright. Well the sad truth is nothings ever going to change.
It's hopeless, so just give up the fight.

add the mins...

Squeeze out that extra min from your day!-----------------------------------------
1.Get used to that glare you get when you get late to office ---
(10-15) mins
2.Create rules for moving all mails from your manager, his manager and his... to deleted folder - (10-15) mins


alrite go on... add the mins

oh! btw not reading useless blogs-- a whole hour a day

home cooking is overhyped!

look at this scenario:
to get you the packet of Instant Noodle soup, 1st Mr.X spent a million dollars (ok ok... say a few grands) to research and come up with the perfect blend of wheat, rice flour, whatever; the exact precision of salt, pepper and spices from exotic, mystical and far off asian land which in turn is a culmination of thousands of years of culture which we are lucky enough to experience all thanks to the globalization, capitalization, exploitation (oops... this is taboo word I guess, but you'ld hear these 3 words in the same sentence quite often); I am straying from the actual topic in hand here.well coming back to the tasty noodle soup, the whole point is this is we are missing out on the million little details which went on into giving you that tasty, delightful pack of instant noodles...

well in short I miss mom's cooking...

life is beautiful... indeed

amidst all the depressing and ugly gore that surrounds you, you tend to come across those liitle moments which touches you so profoundly; makes you realise just how much beauty is around you. These are the moments which makes your life oh so beautiful...

Happy mother's day mom!
I wouldn't be-little all that you've done for me by saying thank you... 'cos words will never be enough!
my only wish is, if ever I am somehow able to give even a tiny protion of what you've given me back!

its gud to be a nobody

I was just going over the ramifications of being famous... not that I am bill gates or anything. Just thinking over the shit I can get away with just because of the fact that I am a nobody and not someone trying to come up with the next revolutionary operating system that's gonna kick everybody eles' ass.
Like I can quote crap and link it to say britney spears... now britney's not going to come back with her hairs or whatevers left of it, screaming murder and asking for a million doller from me... just because of the fact that I am a nobody. just a useless pointer to what i can get away with being a nobody.
now i am really writing trash... maybe i'll apply the local daily for a page 3 article...
arghhh wat the hell

Everything for world peace! \m/

Those precious little minutes of sleep you can squeeze in between the alarm snooze in the morning, what i wouldn't do to have a little more of those daily. Looking back at these small leisure's in life which we have to give up daily, sometimes I wonder why? Why do we've to give these up? For a greater good? Do we get world peace if I skip that wonderful 5 mins of heavenly sleep? Do my avoiding these small sins really make a difference to anybody but me?Why do we have to slog day in day out?To what end?Humans are a selfish being. Every single act we do can be traced back to a small ounce of self fulfillment that we get or feel we'll get out of the act.I wouldn't flinch a bit when I say I've never done a single totally selfless act my entire life. Show me a guy who says otherwise and I'll show you ten guys from Venus. Man I can go on and write probably thousand and a half pages to prove I am correct but then deep down you know I am right, so!

who's correct!!

who's right? it's always the guy with the gun!!! isn't it?
i am more of an old fashioned guy, with a little believe in respecting others' rights and stuff!
but alas the world's not the same no more...
things have changed, for the better? i don't know!!!
all i can say is I am not too keen on the direction in which it is going.

movies to catch up over the weekend!!!

back to my fav timepass...

smokin aces: the only good thing in the netire movie was the closeup scene of Alicia Keys, if you are expectng a quintin tarintino be prepared to be totally disappointed.

ghost rider: biggest letdown of the winter so far. if it weren't for the large popcorn i already paid for, and eva mendes missing shirt buttons I would have left inside of 30 mins.

Amidst all these disappointments I watched one decent movie, The Noteook; I've added Ryan Gosling in the league of Leo D'caprio, Christian Bale, Matt Damon as the crop of young and talented. Catch this one.

crash but don't burn

when u r going to fall, make sure u fall forward!
u never know what's gonna happen or when u gonna fail...
the operative word in life is GAMBLE!!! and that's the beauty,
expect the unexpected!!! life's short, try to make it sweet
cos in d end everybody's gonna loose...

if that's what u define losing as

i ain't no trashcan!!!

wake me up when d pain's gone;
u ain't sharing ur fun,
don't show me ur pain!!!

i ain't no gentlemen,
and i ain't no kleenex!!!

i ain't no trashcan babe, and u ain't no fren!!!

u are not what i need!!

life!!!

over a long enough timeline, survival rate of everybody drops down to zero!!!

never better...

no matter how hard u try to make believe;
fact is u are not important!!!
u are just a tiny spot; well u are not even a spot, u are just nothing! no one's irreplacable...
no matter how gud u think u are, u'll never be the best...

well, there's nothing like 'The Best'! so get ur stupid feet down on the ground and get back to reallity!!!

whose crap's the best???

hi, i can crap the best!!!

so goes the opening line...
i am this i am that... blah blah blah...
why in heaven's sake do we've to go over and over, and some more??
deep down i bet evrybody can make out the crap from the rest!!!
but still, still we harp about our golden crap all day long...

well lady,
i guess if u can't make out the crap from the rest, u ain't worth the fight...
till then...

wat's life???

Choose life.Choose a job.Choose a career.Choose a family.Choose a fucking big television!Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance.Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments.Choose a starter home.Choose your friends.Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics.Choose diy and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning.Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrasment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life. But why would I want to do a thing like that?I chose no to choose life..I chose something else.And the reasons?There are no reasons.
-- Trainspotting